so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
she was so wasted that she tried to tuck me in and read the jokes on the taco bell sauce as a bed time story
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
puking in a sink with a garbage disposal Fucking. Rules. It's like you're punishing your puke when you're done.
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
You never cared about felonies while buying me alcohol from the little Asian woman across the street
ugh I gave him morning sex and he doesn't even text me back for my bagel order
We should probably start extreme couponing for the morning after pill.
Sorry I peed on your ottoman
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
You have my heart. You only share my vagina.
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