i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
today is my dealer's birthday. i dont know whether to give him the day off or call him saying happy birthday ill take a quarter please
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
It's not my fault I help girls realize they're lesbians.
you do realize that we pretended we were worms for like 10 minutes and inched around on the ground, don't you?
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
I'm drinking nothing but vodka and coffee for the next 48 hours. For science.
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
So now I know what having sex while surrounded by chickens feels like.
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
After 3 parties, all of them busted, and 4 field sobriety tests, I AM the cop whisperer
Randomize
