Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
So I used to make fun of texas a lot, then I got here and I found a place where I could get my tequila in a to go cup with a straw and I realized that this is the only place I ever want to be
just heard 2 nerds making fun of a girl for mispronouncing stochiometry. they followed it up by discussing the mathematical equation for getting laid. my day just became 100x better.
Down at cameli's and some homeless dude just pulled out a taser. Awesome.
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
I can't cum and do my makeup at the same time.
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
When one of my seniors asked "Rough night?" I realized my poor decisions involving Tuesday night drinking did not go unnoticed.
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
Our office went out together for the first time to celebrate the fact our coworker got fired.
Yeah I either headbutted a street sign while texting or I defended you two from an evil gang of nazi muggers. I was black out so I am gonna assume it was option b.
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
Randomize
