If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
It wasn't long before I skipped the martini glass and went straight to drinking from the shaker.
WISH UPON A TAMPON
They constantly get farther than me.
tampons.
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary
Nothing brings compassion from a group of cafe workers like walking in and asking if they have a 'hangover special'
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
some how during sex we caught an ENTIRE pillow on fire. A WHOLE PILLOW.
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
i was sitting on the kitchen floor shaking my gallon of vodka at people and asking if they wanted to climb the heaven hill... getting dumped is the best thing that has ever happend to me
Randomize
