he shaved USA in his pubs
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
oh no, im for sure still drunk. i wana eat evrything in the fancy feast commercial... everything
I got arrested for "public intoxication". Fuckers threw me out of the bar into public... i mean shit they have thirsty Thursdays. And I get thrown out for self serve Sundays plus a citation.
I just saw a black chick with an eyepatch. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity.
He straight up just had me drive all the way here and when I got here he was drinking a cup of tea and right after said he needed to go to bed
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
Did I tell you that I told him I deleted his dick pics and he almost started crying?
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
Goal: finish my bio assignment before the Xanax kicks in.
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
Chasing shots with airborne.. Gonna get rid of my sickness and my soberness.
Randomize