Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
So I walked in on her and she had taped her fingers together and was crying and was whispering something about "how humbling it is being in constant glove mode"
A 74 year old man offered to let me sleep on his pull out couch last night.
At IHOP. It feels weird and sad that your cleavage isn't here for me to try to toss paper wads into.
He offered to take my unemployed self out for drinks, but I really just want him to buy me the Beyoncé album
IM TRYING TO SAY GOODNIGHT STOP FOR LIKE FIVE SECONDS WITH THE DICK SUCKING
1. I'm excited for tonight 2. Do we dress up as pirates? 3. Happy Valentine's Day bae
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
There’s so much sex at the hospital I’m beginning to think scrubs were invented to make duty booty easier
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