you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
Hey! Thanks for asking, but it didnt go well. He threw up in the car on the way to dinner. Blind dates arent for everyone.
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
You know Im horny if Im walking around in my lingerie and sex robe. It's my field of dreams mentality. If I wear it, he will come.
If if makes you feel any better, you're definitely the hottest guy I've ever friendzoned.
Know what's awkward? Having a couple of moving guys watch while you detach the bondage cuffs from your bedframe, that's what.
I love when groups of boys part so I can walk through. It's like a red sea of penises, and I am their Moses.
I'm 2 beers deep on an empty stomach, and I just wanna say, I pride myself on my use of commas
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
Tip of the day: Don't Amazon vibrators when your WHOLE FAMILY uses your prime account. There's dildo after dildo showing up in my "Related to Items You've Viewed" category on the home page.
One door closes, one man cooks for you through the next open door
You know it's a good night when the word slut is imprinted on your ass and your hands smell like lube.
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