I'm taking a dump and eating a fortune cookie and it said "Force it to be successful"
No, you can still breathe under the balls.
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
Have u seen my thong? Last time i saw it was drenched in vodka and on his brothers broken lamp.
Nah but tell him his boxers made it to the basement
you strike me as the kind of person who when they spill something on their lap they take off their pants and eat it anyways. right off the crotch seam.
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
Let us bow our heads and pray that I don't throw up in the tub
My brother walked up to us as we were making out and was like "hey man, go to town!" and winked
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
I'm upset for all the future generations who can't drunkenly get cheesy bread
I just had to explain to my grandma what a reach-around is. Too far..
You looked at the bouncer while you pissed on the front door of the bar and said...who the fuck are you?
the fact that I can still put my shoes on is a testament to the fact that I can outdrink these bros
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