I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
I just ate a whole bag of celery instead of getting up to get a glass of water. That high.
MASS TEXT: who ever dared Todd to suck on the Clorox wipes last night.. good goin jackass. you can come visit him, hes in room 266, AFTER hes done getting his stomach pumped.
HE DARED ME TO DARE HIM... DONT PUT THAT ON ME.
she didnt realize that i was putting on the same condom i used the night before with some other girl
I swear to god, allah, buddah and motherfucking oprah winfrey... if I have to stay here any longer because you are holding us up I will choke you out.
Drunk yet?
Well I just did the worm on an empty dance floor while the bridesmaids were serving cake. You tell me.
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
Can we make 2014 the year of no unsolicited dick pics?
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
I shall relish in being the most basic of bitches
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
If you don't respond in the next 30min, I'm going to assume your in a sex coma, in jail, or dead... All of which I've become accustomed to, and will follow the appropriate channels of notification once you notify me.
Good, but still not as good as the guy I banged in the ball crawl
Randomize