I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
After he came all over my face, he proceeded to give me a high five. I can't even act upset because I always put myself in these situations. Did I mention D3: Mighty Ducks was playing in the background?
Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
Home-made laxative recipe: activia yogurt and tequila shots. Any ratio ought to work.
after attempting to eat a candy cane bigger than my hand i have determined there's no way to eat this that doesn't seem erotic
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
I'd like to preapologize if you or your mom see me naked at some point this weekend.
He told you he loved you. Then you wanted to find a chainsaw to cut his dick off.
Is there any chance of you maybe wanting a bouncy house at your wedding. Like maybe a .0001 chance. If so I would totally chip in for that.
I think the cashier at 7/11 might be planning an intervention for me.
Randomize
