This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
I told a kindergarten student that candy canes are bones of reject elves.
I woke up in what appears to be a taco bell graveyard in my bed.
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
I just saw a herd of slutty loofahs run down the street...
my grandma just gave me a shoebox fulled to the top with tootsie rolls and condoms with a not that said "enjoy college, find a big cock" i'm not sure how I feel about this
There's like a dolphin trainer convention here or something. I will parlay this trip to Vegas into riding Shamu if its the last thing I do.
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
We really gotta wear capes to the bar more often...
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