thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
There appears to be a lake on my nightstand. As usual, I should not be considered a suspect. Together, we will find out who did this.
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
She danced with a broom while telling me I was "cool as shit" and she "wishes she could take a portion of my big ass and attach it to hers" then she passed out
My parents don't seem to understand that all I want to do over break is smoke in bed and watch Workaholics.
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
I just paid for weed by taking him to the store to buy cheese so he could make empanadas. Best. Drug deal. Ever.
I met my future husband in an elevator. Think Hispanic version of Dr. Bunsen Honeydew from the Muppets, but with eyes like Michael Fassbender.
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
I like to be the stable force in your otherwise chaotic existence.
The abomination is in progress. At least one barista side eyed me and the other has fear in her eyes
Randomize
