I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
Apparently I think casual Friday means I can show up unshaven in yesterday's clothes and reeking of booze.
i feel like someone uncorked me like a wine bottle and pulled a living animal outta my arse.
I found a fried uncrustable on the table from last night.
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS
I woke up with glitter in my wounds.
Theres a midget tsa agent. Just an observation
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
there is no excuse for drinking mascato in your room alone while listening to one-hit wonders from the 90s
Just your daily reminder that we're terrible people: the average number of men a woman sleeps with in their lifetime is 4
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
DID YOU DO SOMETHING WITH THE DEAD ROACH IN THE KITCHEN? OR DID IT LAZARUS?
The night's not a success unless at least 60% of participants wake up with bite marks on their genitals the next morning.
I don't know what kind of parties you go to, but we should hang out more often.
Randomize
