What would Jesus do? ... Jesus would slap a ho.
Eating doritas dunked in queso con salas. Salllas. Salska. Salsa. Got it. Shhiitt. Salsa con queso. That's better. I'm hot pink socks.
The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.
I just wanna go home eat some pizza rolls, get warm and jerk off, and it's only 845. This shit was supposed to make me see unicorns. Not cry
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
Was I really yelling "girls night" at random chicks before stealing and drinking all their shots?
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
you texted me "dude im face"
it sounded so right at the time
We had sex on a lawn chair while fireworks were going off last night. It was unavoidable that I got mosquito bites all over my ass
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
If you enjoy dance recitals as much as I do, that's one shitty Father's Day...
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
Also, there's definitely not a non-hilarious way to ask to stick something up your butt.
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
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