so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
I don't make the first move. Ever. Unless were playing monopoly cause that's my shit
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
The only thing that made me get out of bed this morning was knowing that tonight, I don't plan on remembering what happened today
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
This bitch rocks a fuckin fanny pack and still manages to lose her phone at every thirsty thursday
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
Ever had one of those went so hard last night you woke up at the foot of the bed naked wondering where your phone ended up?
Randomize
