you ran into the room and announced "I JUST FUCKED HER IN THE ASS". apparently you forgot she left the bedroom 5 minutes before you and was standing with us all.
the clerk said it was the first time she had ever seen someone walk in the next day to return the tux still wearing the tux
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
I'm eating mac and cheese for dinner that way when I puke later it'll be festive halloween orange.
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
He woke me up at 3 am kneeling on the floor pissing and yelling, then he passed out and stole my comforter. I want a new roommate...
I can feel myself smiling like 10 minutes after I stop smiling, and that's just like... so awesome.
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
but there's so much I wanna do before I have kids. like die
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
Randomize
