We did a shot for each one. Father... son... and holy ghost. That wasn't enough though so we moved on to toasting dead relatives.
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
I keep reminding myself that my vagina isn't a homeless shelter.
In my drunkeness I was planning how to throw up without my parents hearing. I was gonna go for a "run" and just throw up outside.
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
Fantastic. I'm pretty cold, tired, dirty, and hungry, but that comes with an adventurous weekend. Who needs a wallet or keys anyway? I could totally be homeless.
So i think i'm going to frame my summons tickets and give them to dad as a christmas present...
I'm not drinking cause I'm like 4 vodkas away from a boom box and Peter Gabriel.
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
Life just isn't the same without him waking me up at 4 in the afternoon with a look of pity on his face...
Well you finally jumped into that tree you've always wanted into and some girl gave you an 8.5. You were very happy.
You shouted, "LOOK I'M HAWKEYE," and beaned mike with a dildo from across the room.
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
Randomize
