I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
she thought Martin Luther king was a president at one time. I love knowing I broke up with my ex and this is what he ends up dating.
She's like a pop up book from hell.
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
He's so gross, but the preschooler inside me is screaming that this is her life dream and I have to be with him or she'll never forgive me.
She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
I'm drunk off vodka and I haven't eaten today. I've never felt more like Kirsten Cohen in my life.
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
Well, I saw an Olympian's genitals tonight, so it can't be that bad.
Please don't bang more than two exes at a time, just so I won't get confused.
Because talking after sexting is equivalent to cuddling after sex
College is really paying off. I am gonna be a great teacher. I just made a grading sheet for weed. This shit got an A.
Randomize