Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
the snow is so cold on my vagina.
why do you have snow on your vagina?
vodka and heels.
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
Just met another girl you fucked but this time in seattle. Your cock gets almost as much mileage as jet blue. Anaheim and seattle both say hi, figured you don't remember their names.
He chipped a tooth on the first beer. You know the night is just going to be a slushy mess after that.
I went limp when I heard her mom fart from her parents bedroom. It lasted longer than my hard on.
He asked me if my princess crown was real and before I could say yes, he was already reaching to put it on. I'm pretending I'm asleep if he tries to have sex.
When you say shenanigans does that mean I should bring birth control?
There should be a Doritos delivery van or something.
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
So red wine goes with eggs, right? Because that's all I have in the house to cook and the drinking options are either wine or scotch
your keys are upstairs on the nightstand or I put them in the hole in the wall
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
Randomize
