Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
Why the fuck do they always fuck on couches in porn?
Don't ever text me while you're jacking off. EVER.
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
I woke up to a shot of jager next to my face. I felt bad for it so i drank it
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
The hookup that almost was... Both partys too drunk to migrate to the other.... the universe has won this one.
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
Randomize
