My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
so last night my mother drunkenly told me that maybe the reason why I want to be a vet was because I was conceived doggy style.
Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home
move.
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
In the hospital waiting to be tested for the first uti of the school year....I'm BACK BTICHES.
The polish Muslims are throwin paczkis into the crowd and I'm beer 6 before 11 am
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
7:26 bus just came. I am sweatier than Louie Anderson eating chili in a sauna
An old biker dude just flirted with me at Food City. I enjoyed it. God damn I need to get laid.
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
See and now you're talking. I am like the fairy godmother of hook ups.
as I was leaving in the morning with his clothes on his roommate pops up and goes 'don't you dare steal that shirt, i gave it to him for his birthday'.
I have had my dick inside of entirely too many people at this wedding in order for me to be the groom. Please give me a swift kick in the dick to wake me up from this nightmare
You took your shirt off at the bar, handed it to a girl, and made her wash your dirty shirt on your washboard abs
tuesdays get the best of me...
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