so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
First thing I heard on the radio when I got in the car: "humans and dinosaurs used to live happily together"... I need to stop listening to Christian radio...
I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
You do realize that you're sleeping with a man who is part of a gay harem, right?
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
Nope, can't do it. It's a snowball effect. Today, leggings as pants. Tomorrow, female hitler. Natural progression.
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
I'm gonna try and get through this weekend sober, which is gonna be tough especially since I've already started drinking.
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
cant one of your roommates drive you?
You came in my eye once. You owe me.
ill be there in 20
Randomize
