I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
Just whacked off in the middle of writing a paper, gave me great ideas. Note, should do this more often.
Is there a nice way to say "I like you, but I hate your dick?"
You made me wash my hair in the kitchen sink while eating bay leaves
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
OH MY GOD I CAN'T WAIT TO BONE YOUR EX BOYFRIEND. HOW AWKWARD IS THIS?
Tried to ride the mechanical bull pants less, got punched for making out with some lesbians wife, and you tipped the bartender with a can of skoal.
I regret nothing
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
well apparently i sat in the bathroom staring in the toliet at my vomit. it was blue. how was your night?
Shame - the story of my life.
Randomize
