i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
Im so sleepy and hes snoring super loud! i just wanna suffocate him, sleep, and deal with the body when I wake up
We got so high we made milksteak
You called me twice to tell me that you spit in your own eye, when I was right next to you.
I was to drunk to drive all the way up there, so we just had rough phone sex instead
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
Yeah. He can't come because his mom found the pizza box under his bed with my underwear in it. He acted confused, guess because i forgot to tell him..
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth!
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
No seriously you guys are gonna get arrested
Do me a favor I want you to reach down the front of your pants and underwear and just feel around for a while... if you happen to find your balls then join us
Yeah, I mean I'll probably fuck him regardless but I'm trying to be a lady about it.
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
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