that's why i date skinny girls, they don't realize how small it is.
Try not to bring up the fact that I woke up and couldn't find my pants... He might get the wrong idea.
Sad news: I might have to institute a "once-per-day" policy on getting trashed downtown. Sorry, reputation.
I asked you how much you drank and you replied with "I don't know what kind of toothpaste I use."
I need to establish a pattern of dominance early.... I'm like a slutty Cesar Milan
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
Your shoe was in the washing machine. I have it in my pocket. My phone rang before and I answered your shoe. Meet me at the bar in 10.
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
All I remember is the bartender saying your sucking them down and waking up on the floor in my underwear
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed
if he becomes president of the united states, I will tell EVERYONE that i took his virginity.
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize
