TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
i think i just heard my dad finish in the other room...
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
I just asked the contractor building my house what it would cost to put a garbage disposal in all the shower drains...there was a lot of judging going on.
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
The best part of tonight is drunk commenting on my moms pic about how birds just want to give you diseases and pluck out your eyes
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
Everything smells like vodka and bologna. WHAT DID YOU DO?
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
Drunk me is having trouble keeping up with sober me's standards
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