did you get engaged???
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
Sometimes I think I have so much sex with you to be sure you're actually straight.
I got laughed at by a homeless guy in a Daniel Boone hat. I have no clue what this means for my day
This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
I've decided I'm going to drink again. More. Day drinking. Night drinking. Everything. It's the responsible thing to do since I'm not pregnant
I got dressed on his front steps, peed on his neighbors lawn, then did a shoeless walk of shame home at 5am...
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
I'M HANGING OUT WITH THE DRUG DEALER UPSTAIRS JUST SO I CAN STEAL HIS WIFI PASSWORD, I HOPE Y'ALL LOVE ME.
I just balanced a full glass of chocolate milk on my left boob. Don't think i've ever been more proud.
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