It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
Oh I forgot to tell you one of the little boys in my preschool class was wearing a Hooters tank top today.
The waiter to-go cupped my bloody mary without me even asking. THAT hungover.
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
I would totes reciprocate the nip pic, but I'm sick with a piece of tissue shoved up one of my nostrils and I'm just not feeling that ambitious. Sorry.
I have drunkenly angered a family of raccoons. Please send help immediately.
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
Just had a customer call his drug dealer in front of me but act like it was normal call.
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
Randomize
