I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
I just saw a homeless man with a cat on a leash. reminded me of you.
You totally narrated your dogs thoughts for 2 and a half hours last night, and I was enthralled. I didn't say one word, I just listened.
We got blackout for the alumni dinner, and then walked THROUGH the keynote speaker, managing to still say "excuse me".
all her text said was "asdfhdaufhudshfuds" and i knew that meant come over
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
I found my soulmate. Behold my idiot as we spaz into the sunset.
Normally roommates threatening each other with knives would be too much crazy for me, but I don't have much going on right now and I feel like this could get interesting. So I think I'm gonna ride this shit out for a while.
I fell out of the car while it was moving then got puked on then puked and cried about then got back in the car and puked out the window when we started moving again
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
Hows your mom
Shes good, she claims she wasnt drunk
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
Randomize
