garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
I pretended I didn't remember seeing him hookup with that freshman, and he pretended he didn't remember seeing me hookup with that old guy. We have a beautiful and unawkward friendship.
If you haven't gone to the store yet. Can you PLEASE get me some clippers my balls will thank you later
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
Literally too hungover to clean. I'll get the frosting off the table tomorrow, ok?
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
How dare sober me try to tell drunk me I can't eat the applesauce in the fridge! Stingy bitch IM EATING THE APPLESAUCE! you can tell sober me I said that.
Btw I thought it was impossible to use up 48 bottles of patron in one night but I was wrong...
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