You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
dude, i woke up naked in her front yard...apparently i tried to leave in the middle of the night, forgot my clothes and decided,"oh heres a nice patch of grass to sleep on" I think god is up there laughing at me.
he wants to bone in the snuggie
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
She wouldn't stop saying her own name. Like a damn pokemon.
Just bought two budlight beers with a can of tuna at the bar
I'm handcuffed to the toilet. Don't ask
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
You still owe me a blowjob for knowing more about hurricanes than you.
Drunk assassins creed leads to explaining to my father that "it was only a steak knife in the arm"
I have fence marks all over my body
Randomize
