yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
so hey instead of everyone buying me a birthday present can everyone just pitch in for my abortion?
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
Some dude just came up to me and stroked my beard, smiled and left. Shave?
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
Wonderful brian is stoned out of his mind, floating in a lawn chair in the hot tub eating a giant plate of macaroni and staring at the moon
I'm worried my skin won't stretch enough to handle this boner. Then what?
Come get me...we were walking home and she kept yelling "people need to get run over more!" then she just sat down in the middle of the street saying "it just feels right."
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
I'm gonna have to get a lube sherpa.
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
Randomize
