so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
I have bruises covered in glitter and someone just asked me if I realized I'm bleeding from both ears. This is awkward.
Sometimes I wish I could open my skin and just take a little peek at my liver. You know, just to see if it's rotten yet or still perfect looking.
Omg I just met another drunk guy that is teaching me karate
I dont even remember coming home... All my stuff is strewn randomly around my apartment... And I woke up at 5 sitting propped up in my bed with just my arm in a shirt
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
Pretty sure I humiliated the fuck out of myself last night after I was dared to attempt to give myself head. I hate vodka
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
That's one good thing about being an only child. I can masturbate wherever the fuck I want
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
You ever stub your boner? It happened to me. Just know that drugs and strip poker and a hot tub. I'll Regale you with the story over drinks later.
Randomize