I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
my sister and i are watching a movie and pregaming together. and by pregaming i mean shes not drinking since she 14 and im drinking alone.
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
new years resolution, not be in jail at midnight for 3rd year in a row.
I hope the doctor doesnt lift up and my shirt and listen to my lungs. I dont want to explain why I have rug burns on my back.
Please just tell me how ugly she was so I can bask in the diminishingly small reassurance that might give me
There where 3 half naked girls passed out on the pool table, I crawled under it and just as I was about to go to sleep some guy walks up and says: "dude nice spot" walks away and comes back with a pillow.
I mean you guys are my friends and all but if you fuck with me I will not hesitate to set you on fire
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
Her son walked into the middle of the living room, took off his diaper, shit on the floor, smiled at me, and walked out, as if nothing happened.
So date night went well?
Had phone sex with my boss who I still haven’t seen in person. How’s your Monday ?
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