she just waddled down the stairs behind me and puked and kind of reached for me but i sped up. does that make me a bad person?
People with herpes should wear stickers.
we just toasted to your mouth on alex's balls at the bar
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
He wrote me poetry. 12 hours after getting my number
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
tonights mission is daddy issue patrol - we wear old spice and drink gin martinis and see who reacts.
Thanks for the morning blowjob. Scientifically proven you can't have a bad day if it starts with a blowjob.
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
Too much dab too little lung dying šµšµšµ
Get over your kidney infection all ready. You have been sober for too long.
Randomize