I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
I woke up with fried rice in my sweatshirt pocket came downstairs and found all the chicken in the fridge gone. I'm THAT roommate aren't I?
she peed on how many people?
im sorry for trying to flush a roll of toilet paper down with my puke. probably not great for your toilet
OH DEAR GOD. He looks like if u licked him he'd taste like bourbon, sex and sunshine.
At the ER, will you come pick me up... Had an allergic reaction, wanted to see if I could eat a peanut without dying... Do you how bad this is evolutionary, I would have died back in the days of survival of the fitest by now
I think Jabba the Hut is dying in the stall next to me.
The convent might be a nice break from real life
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
Other than the whole stab wound in my leg thing, today was pretty good. The nurses all loved me and gave me a sandwich and juice.
Never. No amount of alcohol could convince my brain and eye sight that it is okay to fuck him. I'd rather fuck my cousin.
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
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