How can something that makes you feel so good one day make you feel so bad the next?
Alcohol?
Sex with a fat chick.
My mom caught just caught me jerking off...in her room.
so i woke up this morning thinking _____ was in bed with me. . .but it was only a half eaten sonic burger
Dude, just walked by a homeless guy pissing on the sidewalk while he was screaming at his wang. God, I love this city.
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
I can't wait until next week, when I find out what drunk me added to the Netflix queue.
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
She gained 35 lbs and has an ankle bracelet, time for new booty call.
I found what appears to be half an E pill and part of a tooth in my pocket this morning
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
I am thankful for thumbs.
Because without thumbs, we would be dolphins.
Land dolphins.
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
Randomize
