well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
So baked. Thought the twigs on the sidewalk were caterpillars with the ability to harden in self defense. Had to pick one up to be sure.
I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
My valentine's day: watching The Notebook, and porn, eating chocolate, and ice cream. All while jacking off.
Wow... you've managed to cover all of the sad girl stereotypes that exist.
New term. "Find a husband" fridays. It's like thirsty thursdays, but with a dowry.
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
tell me there's a reason my bed smells like paint thinner
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
Dude. It's not even nine. I don't know yet.
Drink number four. Don't even tell me about its not even nine
Fairly certain I cracked a rib. Masturbation is not for the weak. I die now.
When I picked you up, you were drinking Maker's Mark out of the bottle with a crazy straw.
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
It's taking every bit of my restraint not to go to the store and buy chips and cake and like steal someone's dog. PMS is so weird.
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
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