please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
Oh my god. Just had sex with this girl on the boardroom table at my work at midnight (win!) just realized I left the condom wrapper on the table (lose!)
So we were banging and she started puking all over my bed. I'm not sure what's worse, her puking, or that I felt the urge to start singing Flip-adelphia.
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
Just filled the brita up in the bathtub because we couldn't get it into the sink.
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
Just watched my roommate stuff a sandwich in his pocket because we're out of paper plates.
I just made kick ass drunk stir fry while taking care of three other drunk people and doing shots. I don't understand how that's not wife material
In other news I think my vagina is sunburnt
I owe you an apology, I was appointed captain of this sexy fuckship and I fell asleep at the helm.
Drinking wine while working. Yay.
Just had sex at the YMCA.
We are so productive today.
Man I can't believe I took a huge dump in a public garden
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