so I got guilt tripped into giving her a new years kiss, and she proceeded to try and eat my face while mounting me. when you give a mouse a cookie...
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
I think people like me is why alcohol became illegal at one point
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
That and I was watching this life alert commercial and I'm pretty sure my liver turned up the volume for more information
was I really that bad?
you army crawled across the kitchen floor, turned the cat into "super kitty" and crawled into the dog cage
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
He initiated the conversation by sending me a picture of his penis at 4 am
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
Do we have to do this party tonight? I'm worried my bed will miss me...
I want a musical about memes.
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