theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
she just uttered the sweetest sentence in the english language...my stripper friends are coming over
there is way too much butter on my body for this to be okay
I'm already at the bar. It's 2 PM. Help
Call 911 I'm faking my own death so this fat chick leaves my room
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
I can't wait for you to see these terrible photos I'm about to have taken with some stripper looking girls. I don't know what this photographer is thinking
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
At my eighteen year old cousin's wedding. Getting hit on by a 9 year old. No one knows who he came with. I'm pretty sure he just showed up from the field behind the church. Help.
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
I climbed up on the tank of the toilet so I could take a slo-mo vid of myself pissing into the garbage can, but the base of the toilet shattered and I had to bail.
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
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