Bike broken, reschedule party till thursday:(
Im doing kagels to the beat of Christmas music... "Jingle Bells" is hard. Try it.
I just wanna not walk straight. Is that too much to ask for?
just remembered that i started a tab for just myself at 50 cent beer night last night... i dont understand my life
People are yelling about how much they want you here.
I'm going to change, vomit up my mexican food to save the trouble later, and then come meet you. Thrilled.
I'm going out with a guy whose nickname is Shark Week cause he'll eat anyone. I'm very excited.
You asked me if I was judging you for being drunk, and if I can hypnotize you make sober.
I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
I've finally given up enough on finals week to wear the same shirt three days in a row, because I didn't take my hoodie off for the first two.
i now understand why vodka
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
I just bought condoms and a potted plant, making for a top ten super weird and awkward purchase.
tell him if he brings over dinner you might let him see your left boob...or right, whichever you prefer. But under no circumstances do you let him see both...unless he brings a good desert...like coffee ice cream or something
I had to remind him last night as he had his arm around me, "We hook up, we don't cuddle!"
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