another moral hangover. fuck.
If you could channel this insane talent for stalking you'd be a great weapon for this country. If you had a crush on Bin Ladin, guaranteed he'd be found, monitered and tagged within five days.
maybe you should take the dick out of your mouth before you start talking.
i did. i'm using it as a microphone.
Dude, you really need to stop hitting on girls by telling them you sang a cappella in college.
Apparently the library doesn't care about celebrating the day Jesus became a zombie.
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
how did my horoscope know i was too hungover to operate a stove.
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
I survive off of bourbon and the tears of others only
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
He was actually surprised when I poured myself a glass full of straight vodka. Clearly he doesn't know me as well as he thinks.
Randomize
