I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
Friends don't let friends talk to people who live in Orlando. Sorry I've failed you.
Never get a handjob from a girl who gives deep tissue massages.
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
There is no way I'm taking advice from somone who's idea of a balanced diet consists of vodka and lemon detox juice
High enough to ask the woman at best buy if she ever feels like she's swimming. and telling the man outside that he smells like happy juice.
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
Yeah. I couldn't figure out why my toes hurt. Apparently, the guy I was dancing with, kept running them over with his wheelchair.
I feel like I might be the only person I know who eats bundles of radishes in-between orgasms from their vibrator.
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
There is a man in my bed with "new zealand" tattooed on his back. Wtf happened last night?
Randomize
