hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
I wish i was in the wii world.
He told me he could read braille... with his tongue. So I took him home. I don't think he was lying
He was like an evil genius with the clitoris. I don't stand a chance.
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
YOU NEED TO STOP BLOWING DUDES ON MY COUCH AT MY PARTIES
YOU NEED TO STOP PROVIDING TEQUILA AT YOUR PARTIES
Might be time to reevaluate my life. Banned from red roofs inns. Apparently I puked in ice machine. 3 hotels in a year.
I had sex for the second time today and ate an entire bag of alligator jerky on the way home. These truly are the golden years.
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
Just discovered evidence of drunken eBay bid. Drunk Mike did pretty good -- I'm getting a new sleeping bag.
if i don't get grease into my system pronto i will undoubtedly die
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
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