sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
if she mentions anything about chili and my phone, just go with it
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
All I can remember is posting my chicken burger in the post box. Postman is in for a treat.
Dude you missed it. This guy in the liquor store knocked over a whole display of 5 hour energy with his face.
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
You carried me up the stairs after I told you not to. And what did you tell me? "Let me test my strengths."
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
At some point the phrase "I've hit rock bottom" stopped having a meaning and became my general state of life
Pandora played an ad for a free trial for an abortion pill if you’ve had unprotected sex in the last 2-3 days and then Lucky came on... I literally am dying laughing
Randomize
