Iced coffee. Banana. Two dumps. Life is good.
My idea of sleeping together involves doing the Humpty Hump. Her idea of sleeping together focused more on being fully clothed on the opposite sides of a king sized bed.
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
I wish I could attach your penis to someone I like more than you.
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
In the memo line of the check she wrote sexual healing.
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
You picked up her frozen vom puddle and threw it like a frisbee.
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
I tried to smoke out of half a banana, and lit my nose hair on fire. So I feel like that sums up my life pretty well.
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
I woke up naked and you weren't here. What a relief.
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
Randomize
