and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
sorry for the blank pocket text. My penis obviously has nothing to say to you.
My roommate made me go home after I mooed at fat girls at the gas station.
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
I seriously don't understand how you keep getting laid.
Because I'm like the spider of false hope. I spin elaborate tales and snare them in my web of utter disappointment. They soon realize their mistake, but by then it's too late.
the liver wants what the liver wants
She still didn't believe that he would cheat on her so I finally said "how else would I know that his batman mask is still in the back of his car from halloween?" I think she accepted it
So, I had a dream last night that involved you as an actual cloaked Captain America and a lot of weird sex, and I didn't hate it.
I totally just pulled my thong out of my purse at the grocery store. Oops.
YOU LICKED MY MAKEUP OFF.
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
Randomize
