Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
I wish i was in the wii world.
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
You crawled everywhere and rolled in ice cream. No more vodka for a month.
I woke up to a 3rd person picture of my own dick sent from a 1-800 number..
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
Worst case scenario, I put a giant cork in your vagina so you don't give birth before my birthday
So are you actually going to come fuck me in the ass this weekend, or was that just you being drunk in a kilt?
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
He is a real estate investor who’s face I’m going to sit on.
Stop letting me drink alone on saturdays. My last 2 google searches were "short legs" and "caterpillar eyebrows" ? I don't even know.
She called a 10 year old handsome and we gave her a look that was equal parts confused and “what the hell is wrong with you”
Randomize
