Our Neighbors are trying to steal our ducks!
Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
my mother just offered to pay for my fake id.
Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
My mom just admitted you were a good looking kid & if you weren't my friend & 30 years older she would do you. I'm going to commit suicide.
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
I am too high to deal with coming home to 11 naked people in my living room
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
I woke up beside him and almost cried. Then I realized you were on the other side so I knew I hadn't made any bad decisions.
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
PANTIES FOUND
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
Randomize
